Bon Apetite

One thing is for sure.  Life is a series of events.  The fortunate and not so fortunate.

I shocked myself yesterday and wondered what had happened in my life to get me here…cleaning up mucus throw up laced with hot dogs with one hand as I finished eating my orange with the other.  I have become…..Shrek.  A female Shrek.

My baby was eating cat food.  I walked away.  He decided he didn’t love cat food and I decided that wet cat food smells worse than dry cat food.  My baby tried to take his diaper off.  I found him walking around with a half-filled diaper.  The other half was making a nice trail across my upstairs carpeted playroom.  I have been cleaning these kind of “messes” for a while.  The only difference between the first 12 years and the last two is this:  lower blood pressure.  I don’t think my heart rate rises in the least bit anymore.  I am wondering what is next.  A coma?

I guess it could be worse.  I could be serving up the cat food for dinner.  I wonder if anyone would know if I threw it in the spaghetti sauce and served it over noodles? Certainly would save time…..

Dinner anyone?

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~ by pandmcox on January 18, 2010.

12 Responses to “Bon Apetite”

  1. LOL! That is just sick! And very true as I leaned over with a piece of toilet paper and wiped my dogs butt this morning…..yes, you read correctly. My dogs butt that is so hairy a chunk of crap stuck to it………

    I KNOW I did not sign up for this…….

    • I know you are the funniest woman EVER….always willing to throw yourself under the bus for a good post or comment….whew….catching my breath here…

  2. Actually, I think you could do it. I think if you dropped a little garlic on there and grilled the stuff, nobody’d know the diff. And like Rachel, we have to wipe dog butts, too, or we find nuggets – with our bare feet – on the carpet. I remember the days of leaking diapers. And now I shovel manure. I’m tired, and my blood pressure is NOT low. In fact, I’m having a meltdown, even as I write this.

    Mortal life – did we sign up to be girls? Heck, did we sign up to be HUMAN?

  3. EWWWWwwwwwWWWWWwwwwWWWWW!!!!!!!!
    LOL!

  4. Oh Misty – that is funny. Neccesity has reared it’s ugly head. When we were kids this would have totally grossed us out – but now we don’t miss a beat and then look in the mirror and say wow “did I really just do that”.

    Hmmm, cat food in spaghetti – well – lets hope your senses are not that wore down just yet.

    Thanks for the laugh today.

  5. I’m shaking my head. I haven’t got to that point yet; not sure I want to.

  6. well you didn’t mind the catfood in the spagetti sauce growing up LOL…… hey i kid, do NOT do that to my grandbabies.

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